Bucket list!

In an attempt to convert my rusty, old blog that eats, breathes and lives "love" and emotions so much that as i read through it, i see posts talking on and on about them, i hereby make an attempt to make it as real as i can.
And i start with my bucket list:

• Get Tattooed- Not the first in sequence, but listing it as i can tick it( Huge grin :-D) I am a brave owner of 3 small tattooes and i love each one of them. In the process, i inspired DH to do the same :-P
• Travel to Santorini- This year, i tell myself !
• Travel as much as i can- I feel extensive travel is still a far reaching goal but let's see life!
• Trek to Mt Everest- I can't say when-probably when i am free of motherly duties and my princess is older enough to survive without a mom just in case :-P
• Confessions- Could be any ,maybe to my school crush who i secretly admired for a long long time( and never ever talked- talk about butterflies in stomach!)
• Have more fun moments with friends!
• Write a book- No idea when this is happening.
• Do something i love  a lot-with my life -could be picking up hobbies or just having load of "Me" time away from facebook and other time consuming and focus draining things i do on most days apart from my daily tasks :-P( one being following groups on fitness and doing nothing about it except watching people get fit)
• Be in the best shape of my life- This i say to myself every year and with each passing year  as i write this- i am moving farther away from this one:-D
• Be my daughter's best friend and letting her be a free bird- Am a typical mom, always juggling between trying to "fit in" by letting my daughter take her own decisions at 4 to continously mumbling and urging her to eat, drink and do all such tasks every parent worries about, endlessly. 

I guess enough for now till i get back and fill more !!

Dear Diary!

Dear diary,

Yesterday i watched DDLJ after ages, ( i am not a fan of repeating movies - more like a one and done person except if something touches my heart) and i was mesmerized to say the least.

The movie seemed to bring back memories of the kind of love everyone spoke about- the kind of relationships i saw flourishing among my college friends, the simple silly crushes me and i my friends used to rave about and the lovey dovey couples i used to see in college/school.

In the 10 odd years that passed, what has changed so much that i don't see that "expression of love" that would make me go week in the knees? I see that "love" so rare in movies-let alone real life.

Did my "view" change now that am married and busy juggling between myriad roles in one day- a  paranoid mom always after her daughter to ensure she obliges and eats/drinks/stays well or a confused professional, running from one meeting to another and trying to understand zillions of things happening in workspace , or a lazy wife who takes the easy route cooking simple meals with less spice to have a piece of mind in each busy day ? 

or did everyone  and everything change around me- it sure is the latter.In our busy busy world of gadgets and facebook, we are all busy projecting a better side of ourselves, that we do not realize the need to have those moments which involve:

• tirelessly caring for each other 
• Being so much in each other's lives that anything can wait- to be with them means the world and everything else is secondary
• Despite the pressures of our life clock ticking each second, we take out the time to listen, empathize and uplift each other

Do we still see innocent love? The love that believes so much that it travels miles to make things happen- the love that trusts and moves mountains? In our new world of  gadgets where apps like Tinder-help people take shortcuts to find/lose the love/companionships they are seeking, I wonder if we are losing on charisma and warmth the relationships of pre-smartphone era brought to all of us??

Something to ponder!!

Have you ever gone back  retrospecting the 'old' days? not just good but the not so good ones too
Have you ever thought how life was then, and now you have millions of memories to pen.
That first crush in school whom you couldn't stop thinking about,
and embarrased you feel, remembering that you were a child so chubby and stout.
Those years in school, trying to stand apart,
Those nights of studying/sleeping over a pile of books, working so hard.
The school friends,gossips,reserving seats on school bus,
The dreaded morning assembly,when you knew a missing coat button and the P.T. Teacher would make a fuss.
The simple,innocent college days of doing nothing,
of sleeping in boring lectures, and mass bunking.
When you didnt even know all your classmates -guys by their face,
Sometimes mistaking one of them as your senior,what a phase!!
And then came the first job, the new shining world of people and places,
Since you grew up, money, promotion and so on-running along for your consecutive chases.
And see how far along, we have come,
winning some,losing some and keeping some.(Pun intended!!)

I wish speaking my heart out to some people,
to that guy who thought i am not good enough,
Or to that first crush, that he ringed a bell.
I want to pat my back for those hardships, when  i rose up everytime i fell.
To Hug those friends whose words uplifted me all the time,
To thank those amazing buddies  with whom i had a whale of a time.
To give a shout out to those roomies, who still bring a smile,
To call those people who matter, that i haven't met in a while.

 "
Thanks to you all, it has been a nice ride..
To the few who went ahead, to those left behind and  the ones who chose to be at my side..
I am still twisting,turning and bumping along,
 dancing at times to  my own song.
Till one day  the wheels give up on me,
Till then I will be looking upon thee.."

The Star of my life!

Yes, i am a 'mother'!! With 7 months of memories,surprises, crazy days, wakeful nights  has come millions of years worth of true love, a love which i could never feel before . In those four toothed smiles lies my world of happiness,in those naughty acts lies my humour and in those adorable kisses by my princess,lies the reward of my hardwork.

 Truly said,when you become parents, you discover true love, the one where you give without any intention of taking anything in return.

Motherhood is great...
P.S.: The post is short but dedicated to my little pumpkin.

Just another day!

Just ended a sad sad movie 'August: Osage county' and after a bunch of slow songs, i am here,after long.This time too,have nothing in mind except some hazy lil memories, some recent,some old.

Memories,they never leave you,no matter what you do,wherever you go.That you choose to preserve some all the time is a different story.But they do remain,somewhere in your mind,crystal clear.

Talking of crystal clear,will talk of the movie here.Liked the movie but it had so many loose ends.

So much pain,helplessness, and yet a hint of reality embedded deep within each small loose end.Such is life,we can't always have everything and by a fair chance,as soon as we get close to having almost everything,we make stupid mistakes and create reasons to be unhappy.

 I always wonder if i could adore whatever i have each day.I realize some days that the world is so beautiful and everything around me is so wonderful, but i wish i give such vibe often.

I wish to make my days brighter and happier but come each day-the hustle bustle,and the crazy measures to survive and whoosh,these simple thoughts vapourize.

I have seen people,so full of life and so happy,within their small worlds, and i wonder,does something ever pester them?

 

Been there,done that!

Could have been my exact state of mind,had i achieved what i was hoping for!Still,some victories come far too difficult than you expect them to!Never mind, there's always a tomorrow!But i just hope that i retain the desire to achieve the same things over time and work for them.Because persistence is always easier said than done.The title of this post, came through to me as someone's FB status who achieved the same goal i wished for,sometime ago.Hoping to land in same feet,i guess i underestimated myself earlier and didn't do well,relying on last minute preparations.
Well, lets see how it goes,if only i plan a next time!!

Till then,theres always tomorrow!

If you are a writer!

If you are a writer,you can never get lonely,
If you are a writer,you rejoice reading deep,twisted lines having simplest of meanings.
If you are a writer,you end up writing pages with a single thought in mind.
If you are a writer,you catch hold of your blog when you  feel sombre,
If you are a writer,you don't want to repeat words(i am hating repeating the first few lines,but thats the way it is supposed to be ).
If you are a writer,you apprehend things too deeply too often(which isn't required sometimes :-P).
If you are a writer,your words are self assuring many a times,
If you are a writer,you love it when your literary skills are put to test.
If you are a writer,you pen things down just when you feel you are not at your best.
If you are a writer, you end up creating beautiful write-ups in extremes( when you are too happy or too sad) or probably feeling too technical(for the geeky bloggers).
If you are a writer,you would never let go of your blog completely
If you are a writer, you dream a lot, think too much and say too little about your dreams.
If you are a writer,you are amazed every time you look at your past blogs.
If you are a writer,you see the world with your own picture every time you write something.

If you are a writer,you agree with me in at least some of the things mentioned above :-D