Shshh........

Far away from the crowd,there i stand -silent and numb.Not that i have nothing to say, but the fact is that i am on my way to try out if silence is really golden.Outside,i seem poised and settled,more to say,satisfied with the way life is turning up,but,deep down under,i can hear the echoes very clearly,yes,faint but still clearly audible, myself shrieking and shouting,trying to speak up to my heart's content,satisfied in the least with how the things are shaping up.
Hmmm...wondering whether what i believe is an exaggeration...am i really dissatisfied or frustrated??Don't i have the things one needs to be happy??Dont i have accomplishments or feats in my kitty??Dont i have loving people to fall back upon whenever the storm of solitude takes me away ??Dont i have what is called the"passion" to live everyday up??
Seems this is an unending tirade of questions that erupt in my mind out of nowhere.Blaming my silly ideas and wayward thoughts,i move on.Yeah,most of the above is not true,but is not false either.Controversies and confusions apart,there are somethings i would like to change, many of them rather, so that i can recreate that so called passion or spirit that i used to carry earlier,which has been covered by the sands of time and age....
Philosophically speaking, can silence be golden??At this instant itself,i can count atleast twenty things i would like to speak up about with somebody or the other,things i would like to clarify,explanations that i would like to ask for,those hidden revelations that i would like to make to those i care about,some ideas that i fear are weird but still i would like to share.....and the words go on.But the moment is not right.I cannot speak.Because they say u can't help somethings by speaking up or complaining against them,u end up making matters worse that way.So,u should remain silent because its golden.Like a golden pot can't make sounds when beaten ,similarly,i feel silence can't really help hit the problem and find solutions for it,rather it is silence onle that kills.Kills opportunities,kills confidence,kills love,kills patience and kills the spirits to rise above all odds once u feel that the matters are cold now..
So,silence may be golden,but there does'nt really exists any difference between a person crying in a small hut or the one crying inside a golden house.Silence is no more the way to curb the problems - it is about holding back and running away from them,in the name of the unnecessary task of justifying urself and not giving others the right to question ur actions.in this busy world,where evryone is mad building fortunes,do u expect somebody to hear ur silence,though i dont say silence doesn't speak,but u need to shout in today's times,let alone speaking,??
So,just let the words flow and decide ur fate , as they say.....
Its only words and words are all i have to take ur heart away